I just listed this on Etsy. I really enjoy cutting into canvas and creating a 3D view. I again used a print of my mother as a young girl. I just adore this image of her. She reminds me so much of my niece, Julia in this picture.
I hope to create lots more this weekend. A bunch of canvas is waiting for me at my post office.
Hope you all have a wonderful weekend. Anyone doing anything exciting??? Would love to hear all about it.
Yes, it's been an emotional ride lately, more than ever. I've been painting my art room a bright sunny yellow. I love it. I'll share pictures soon. My girlfriend, Cathy, told me that yellow is a color of healing. I'm glad I chose that, for I need much healing these days. I can't really figure out why I'm like I am right now. I don't feel myself at all. I feel very discontented. I really don't like when I'm feeling this way. It's been a long time since I have. Today I finally created a couple of pieces. One I think I'll keep of my mom, and one I'll put up tomorrow on Etsy. It's been awhile since I have done so. I'm so organized now in my art room, I can't find anything. How funny is that!
Our Orphan, Van in Myanmar
First, I want to share that Ron and I have supported an orphan in Myanmar for the last year and half where the devastation took place. Her name is Van. Isn't she darling! We have learned that she survived along with the rest of the children at the place they reside. Now it's about getting them food and water. As you may know, this country isn't doing all they can for their people. It is terribly sad. But we are finding a way through the ministry we belong with, to get financial support needed so they can buy what they need to survive. If you are interested in helping, email me, and I can link you up to this ministry. When the orphanage first began, I created canvas collages of all the kids for their supporters. Mine is a little different than the others. These kids love to paint their faces. I think I picked her out because I loved how she painted hers. Please say prayers for this precious girl and all the people of this land, and China too. It all seems too much, doesn't it?
We just received a letter from Van not to long ago. I wish I could bring her home to live with us. Wow, now wouldn't that be something. You never know, miracles happen and I believe in them, indeed.
Today I did manage to create a couple of canvases. I used my mom's little girl picture. I was going to sell this, but not sure. I just love it. It brought so much emotion out in me today. I so miss my mom, more than anything. I'm still trying to come to terms that she really is gone. It's still so hard to believe.
"bound together by the silkon bonds of love"
Today being mother's day, well, to be honest I've been trying to forget. The emotions are just to great. But I did receive a phone call today that just made my day. My precious niece, Lindsay called, saying happy Mother's day because you are like a second mother to me. How wonderful is that!!!! I love you Lindsay more than words could ever express.
I saw my mom one year ago, the day before Mother's day because I was still doing chemo. I had to fly back home. I gave her a special necklace...and so wish I could have that back...but I will never see any of my mom's things.
I had a dream the other day. I do have my mom's things that she left behind in her suitcase...that dreadful flight to So. Cal. where it killed her. In that suitcase was these precious shoes. I have them sitting on my hearth in the living room. Anyway, she came to me in a dream saying "I need to get my shoes". I said, "but mom, you can't take your shoes to heaven." She responded, "yes, I know, but can I wear them for a little while".
How cute is that! There was my mom wearing her shoes for just a bit. My mom was such a shoe girl. Oh mom, so glad I have your shoes and all the memories of who you were. You will always make me smile because you loved life. You made me laugh and I made you laugh. We had the best of the best when things were going. I know we have had our fall outs. Don't all mother and daughters? I'm just pretending now that you aren't speaking to me because I did something wrong in your eyes. Somehow that comforts me. Strange yes, but familiar.
Eve, pictured in the middle was a precious lady. She joined our cancer support group I started last year after chemo. Eve had lung cancer. She came to our meetings the last four months. I learned today that Eve didn't make it and died this past week. She was at our last meeting and was going in for surgery just a few days later. She had a tough time of it and developed Pneumonia, which killed her. I don't understand why they do surgery on someone in their 80's. She was so vibrant, full of life, so loving, so precious. Doesn't she look so cute in her wig!
At our last meeting we painted t-shirts. We try and come up with crafty things to do at our meetings. It's not all about "cancer" but being together and if someone needs encouragement, we give it. I didn't want it to be a group where we just dwell on cancer. And it isn't. I know Eve had such a wonderful time with us. We will miss her so much. Her ninety year old husband drove her to our meetings and waited out in the car. How kind of him, a wonderful husband.
One more daughter grieving loosing her mom. We bought Eve a special bracelet just a few weeks ago and have been waiting to give it to her once she got out of ICU, but that didn't happen. We will now give it to her daughter, Diana.
Eve really enjoyed painting her t-shirt with rubber stamps.
As if Mother's Day approaching here in the US tomorrow wasn't hard enough. I've been so emotional all week. I've been repainting my art room in a bright yellow to add some sunshine to my life. I need color around me to pick me up and not be so sad. My first Mother's Day without my mom is hard, no doubt. Tomorrow I will celebrate my mom's life here, so stay tuned. I will get through this, as all mother-less daughters do.
Today is my sister, Nancy's 50th birthday. HAPPY BIRTHDAY NANCE!!!!!
Finally, I have a sibling joining me in the 50's. Doesn't seem possible, but that is how life is. Nancy is 15 months younger than I, NOT MUCH!!! She always likes to say I'm the OLDER one. Too funny! I adore my sister and she has been the best support for me, and I hope for her, as we grieve together the loss of our mother. Mother's Day and Nancy's birthday always are close together. Last year I was with my sister and mom at this time of year. Nancy is really always been the rock of our family, holding us all together. When we are all together, it is always at her home. She is a great cook and naturally has a gift of hospitality. She is a mother of three, Lindsay, Chelsea and Tim. She loves being a mom to her kids. Recently she got the best news ever. Lindsay will be transfered to West Point in New York, which means she will NOT be deployed again to Iraq. We are all so happy about this.
Love you Nance and glad that I have you as my sister. Happy Birthday!!!
Gosh, it seems like forever since I've created anything to sell. I've been sick with Pneumonia and haven't felt like doing much, but I did. Today I finished up these pieces since the antibiotics are kicking in, I felt up to it.
Now selling on Etsy.Doll Assemblage titled PROTECTOR
I call this Protector, dedicating it to all the mother's of the world who have protected their children. Mother's day in the US is approaching. At first I felt angry about it having just lost my mom, but instead I am going to embrace it, creating pieces about mother's. I do believe this will bring continued healing to my heart. She is only gone from earth, but not from my heart. I miss her more every day. While sick I kept going for the telephone to call her. Everyone wants their mommy's when they are sick. The piece above is once again the face my mama painted right before her departure. While creating it, I remembered The Good Old Days with her and that put a smile on my face. 
I flew into Fort Lauderdale, Florida last week to celebrate my Uncle Bob and Aunt Jan's 50th Wedding Anniversary. They live about an hour north in the most beautiful Equestrian Village. I came home terribly sick and am just now feeling like getting out of bed. I caught a nasty cold and flu. I'm still trying to reply to emails, but am a bit slow right now.
I made this piece of my aunt and uncle of their wedding picture as a gift for them. My aunt cried when she opened it. She really loved it. 
They have five children, my cousins who all live in Florida. We all grew up together in New England but in the 1970's they moved to Florida and we moved to California. Uncle Bob is my mother's brother, only sibling.
They have had much success with a family business in air conditioning, but what impresses me the most is their 50 year commitment to each other. To me that is the best success anyone can achieve, and still love each other.
My cousins gave them a beautiful party and spared no expense. It showed in every detail. 
It was a 50's Sock Hop. Look how cute they are dressed like this.
Here are my cousins, Mary Jo and Bonnie, and their daughters, Lexi and Jade. The PINK Ladies (from Greece)
I loved being around all their horses, cow, sheep, chickens and dogs.
I stayed with my youngest cousin Mary Jo a few nights. This is Mary and her horse, Beauty and her daughter Jade with one of the chickens. 
My aunt Jan has a pet cow 
And Mary has a sheep named Bella (and I'm a collector of sheep so I loved meeting Bella) 
and thinking about my friend Bella who I adore!
Where they live is really beautiful. It was fun to see the daily routines of what it takes to take care of so many animals. It is a lot of work, I can see that.
The last day of my trip, they took me on their airplane down to the keys where they have a vacation home. We had lunch and then flew back. It was such a joy to do this and see Florida like that from the air. The color of the water was the most beautiful aqua blue. I really enjoyed the keys and could see myself living there too.
Thank you Uncle Bob and Aunt Jan for a wonderful week at your home. Congrats again on your 50 years of marriage. I wish you many more!!!
Yesterday I met with my oncologist again. To be honest, I am just doing life and want to forgot I ever had breast cancer. But every few months I'm suppose to go in for a check up, and it's that dang reminder again. My experience yesterday was horrible. My dear sweet husband, Ron, came with me.
I was dreading telling my doctor that I did Tamoxifen for one month and stopped because it turned me into another person. I instantly went up two dress sizes (and still haven't gotten it off). I was living on edge and I didn't like the person I became, so I stopped. She (doctor) pretty much told me I am then wasting my time and hers if I'm not going to do this. Ron proceeded to tell her how I'm influenced not wanting to take this drug and she interrupted him and said, "I don't need anymore customers". I couldn't believe this and Ron can't either. Gosh, I want to be more than a CUSTOMER in my doctors eyes. Why am I picking bad ones??? Is it me??
I sat there in front of her with tears rolling down my eyes. She had no compassion what so ever that my mom has just died. She was 100% clinical and I guess if I won't do the tamoxifen, she won't be my doctor. She wants to put me on an anti-depressant to manage the symptoms this drug does. I'm not sure what I am going to do. She told me to really think about it and make a decision next week.
Tomorrow I leave on a trip for a week. It will be good to get away and think about it all. I'll share about the trip when I get back here on my blog.
THE NICER, MORE LOVING SIDE OF BREAST CANCER:
The amazing Monica Magness has finished putting together thee AMAZING Art Doll named LOVED SQUARED to raise funds for the Susan Koman Fund. 
I made two art squares for the doll, one graces the front skirt and one will be added to a wall hanging. My square on this skirt is 
the first one on the top left. Check out Monica's blog to see all the beautiful details of this doll. What a treasure it has turned out to be. I hope it raises tons of money, for it is worth thousands in my book. What an angel on earth Monica is to have collected and assembled this in honor of all who have struggled with Breast Cancer. It blesses my soul.
LIVE LIFE BEAUTIFULLY: Monica requests on her blog, that we who have helped make her, show her off on our blogs and dedicate her to a friend who touched your heart and a family member who supports you unconditionally.
DEDICATED TO MY FRIENDS - I can't just pick one. I have to pick ALL my friends who supported me during my cancer journey last year here on line. I call you MY ANGELS ON EARTH, for without you all, I would have had a really dark time. It wasn't like that at all because so many encouraged me through emails, posts, gifts, cards, and phone calls and best of all, the prayers. My one EARTH Angel, Geri, I also dedicate this to, who lives near and supported me in many ways by her constant phone calls and visits, making me the best carrot juice ever!!! Thank you all so very much and thank you for your continued support.
DEDICATED TO A FAMILY MEMBER - Well, though my mama is now gone to heaven, I still dedicate this doll to her. Mom, if you can hear me, thank you so much for caring so much. It was so hard yesterday coming home after that doctor's visit and not being able to call you and cry my eyes out to you. But so much you said to me this past year held me together, even yesterday through the struggle. I am glad in so many ways Mama that you don't have to worry about me any more and my cancer. You were so afraid. But you loved me through it, and tried really hard to understand my choices, even though they weren't the one's you would have picked. Thank you Mama for giving to me your support that will carry me to my end. Please know that Nancy is trying to take your place and push me to keep fighting. She is being the sister I so need and I thank her for that. She let me cry my heart out last night, listening, encouraging me, just like you would have. So I also dedicate this doll to my sister, Nancy. Thank you Mama and thank you beloved sister Nance. And of course I must thank my husband, for he loves me unconditionally and for that I treasure!
See you all in a week. Love to all!
